I would think that the difference is in the eye of the beholder. Here is my own view/opinion on this one,Am sure you have your own opinion.
A Woman is a fully developed human being of the female gender who is capable, independent, confident, self-assured, assertive (even aggressive if a situation dictates) - any and all of the qualities that adulthood dictates. A Woman has all the rights and responsibilities that go hand-in-hand with being an adult human; and as many of the privileges as she can demand from this same status. A Woman has the ability to make up her own mind about what she will and will not do, will and will not allow in her life.
A Lady is a woman for whom society has set certain 'rules' that keep her in her place - the Lady's Room. She must be genteel, elegant, sophisticated, well-mannered, and 'know her place'. Any activity not condoned by the social mores of her society will suffice to keep her there - and will stunt her ability to develop into a fully developed woman - capable, independent, confident, self-assured, assertive/aggressive. A Lady is circumscribed by the mandates of said society in that she must match her will and desires to the dictates of same. The lines of a defined 'Lady' are somewhat more blurred than in years previous to today though they (the lines) are still very much ingrained into the seams of society (reference Titanic and the roles placed upon women even in very early 'woman'hood at that time).
Various societal contrivances have been utilized over the years to ensure that women adhere to the mandates of society in complying with the Lady Rule. Failure to comply results in a Woman suffering the consequences. The rules are less stringently and overtly enforced as in years past; but are still very much alive within the framework of society and many still carry some of the same penalties.
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